One thing that my mother has always said is that you have to have a good memory to be a liar. Whether it be a white liar, told for the good of another or a blatant lie with no regard for the truth; the lie that you tell takes on a life of it's own.
Unlike the truth which speaks for itself, a lie requires a back story. The bigger the lie, the bigger the back story. Personally, I cannot stand a liar. I would rather be cut to shreds with the truth than deceived with a lie.
One thing that I cannot understand is when a person tells a lie in order to impress another. I recently read an article in the Independent about a recent survey that had been commissioned by Into The Blue about the most common lies that people tell in order to impress others. The results were quite shocking to me and it made me wonder; just how shallow are we?
The survey spoke to nearly 2500 people asking questions about the lies that they have told in order to impress another, be it a work colleague, a friend or a potential love interest.
These are the top ten lies that people tell in order to make an impression on someone else:
1) Skydiving – 45%
2) Met a celebrity – 41%
3) Attended a music event – 36%
4) Bungee jump – 29%
5) Being arrested/Spent time in jail – 25%
6) School/University results – 23%
7) Charity fundraising – 20%
8) Attended a major sporting event – 19%
9) Exotic travels – 17%
10) Working in the forces – 15%
A further 8% of respondents confessed that they had lied about saving somebody’s life. That goes beyond trying to impress, it is downright disgusting. Apart from anything else, how do you support and maintain a lie like that?
To quote Elvis Presley (I didn't expect this quote to be from him either):
The truth is like the sun. You can shut it out for a time, but it ain't goin' away.According to the survey, just under a third had told a lie in an attempt to attract a romantic partner, with a fifth lying to people who were already their friends. The thing is, that lie may attract someone at first or impress them. But the truth always prevails in the end and you wind up looking at best disingenuous and at worst, a truly horrible person who deceives in order to attain their goal.
For me, if you lie to me then you are out of my life. If I cannot trust you, what is the point in a relationship, whether it a friend or a loved one. The closer the connection to someone, the more the after effects of a lie can hurt.
I will leave you with another quote. I do not know who said this but for me, it cuts through the truth about lying:
The worst thing about being lied to is knowing that you weren't worth the truth.
I think it comes down to what's called 'status anxiety' - people seem to think that people will see the as a better person if they've skydived (or whatever). What happened to being valued for being good, kind ... and honest!?!
ReplyDeleteIt's sad that so many people feel they have to lie to impress others, instead of just being who they are. I know I've never judged anybody on where they've been, or what they've achieved in life; it doesn't matter to me! I'd much rather a person was honest with me, instead of lying to my face. I can't stand being lied to, and I lose all respect for people who do. It's happened enough times, and all I can say is that the truth does eventually catch up with them, and it doesn't usually end so well for them. xx.
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