The Funny Fat Friend

I saw a meme tonight.  When you go on the internet you see many.  Some hilarious, some make you want to beat your head repeatedly against a wall.  This was one of them.

There is a perception in society that says that if you are fat, you must compensate for it.  Whether this is dressing always in black, being on a permanent diet and hating yourself or being the kind of fat person that is the "good fat" aka hating on other fat people, the "yes I am fat but you can like me because I insult other fat people, we are horrendous I agree with you" type.

There is another "good" type of fat person.  The funny fat friend. We see it in films all the time.  Fat people playing a role, aimed at us being more "acceptable".  I have fallen into this role before.  Over compensating for my size by trying to be funny.  Trying to detract from what I look like.

You cannot hurt me if you think I am funny.  You do not need to see me as a woman, a sexual being if you can put a label on me and put me in that box.

SCREW THAT.  I am not a label.  I am not just one thing.  I do not need to "compensate" for what I look like.

This is something that has been rumbling in my head for a while now.  The people that expect fat people to be funny.  To compensate.  That people that say "Oh I bet you are funny" when trying to picture me in a friend group.

Sometimes I am funny.  Sometimes I am a bitch.  Sometimes I am quiet.  Sometimes I am fun.  I am not here on this planet to play a part or a role for someone.  I am myself and if you don't like me, that is fine.  If you don't find me attractive, that is also fine.  But I am not here for your fucking entertainment.

I am tired of the perception that if you are fat, you must compensate others.  Trade off what you look like by offering something up, like humour by way of a payment for them having to look at you.

I am enough,  You are enough, We are all enough.  Fat, funny or a fucking bitch.  We deserve to be taken for who we are.  Not treated differently or have expectations put on us because of the size of our stomach is something that you have to blank out and find something else about us to talk about.

You are enough.  Do not like ANYBODY tell you different. 

How well do you know yourself?

I don’t know about you, but it surprises me about much I have changed over the years.

I think that it when you turn 30 that your personality really kicks in and you find out who you are.  Sometimes that is surprising.

Up until 30 I was always shy, I agreed with everything people said, even if I didn’t agree.  I was always nice to everybody, and scared of being disliked.  These days, things are somewhat different.

I have always been a loyal person, have always fiercely defended my friends.  That has never changed.   Now however, I am not scared to say what my opinion is and most would say, and is no doubt evidenced by this blog, that I am rather opinionated.  Also very sarcastic, but only to those I know can take it.

These days, I say what I think and I mean what I say.  This is probably offset by the fact that I am still shy until people get to know me and I have still have the overwhelming urge to be liked.

This may explain the comment I got today

Babe, you know what, I know you and you are a sweetheart, but if I didn't, I'd think you were a bitch.

Well, I think that covers all bases there! At the end of the day, it is more important to know who you are, and accept it.  Be who you are and learn to like it.  Took me 32 years to figure that out!