Losing my Way

I’ve lost my way in blogging.   I didn’t mean to, but it has gradually happened over the course of the past few months and I have realised it this week.

Since February of this year my blog has become very plus size fashion focussed, with just the odd opinion piece thrown in.  Whilst I love putting up the pictures, writing about the clothes and choosing my outfits to go on the blog, I am now feeling a pressure behind it.

This is a pressure of my own making, to always have a new outfit to show, making sure I have enough clothing posts on the blog each week.  What is that even all about? To have “enough” clothing posts?  Since when have I put my blog under a military regime of what I can and cannot blog about?

I had another opinion post that I was going to put up this week and I found myself worrying that I should have been putting up an outfit instead.  That’s when it hit me; I have become more focussed on what other people think of my blog than what I think about it.  It wasn’t intentional, but it happened.

I have become too obsessed with fan girling about other people’s fashion blogs, about how many great outfit posts they do, how well they always style clothing, how regularly they post and how good their blogs look.  I realised that I have turned my own blog into effectively keeping up with the Jones.

I never wanted my blog to be one subject based.  I enjoy doing my opinion/rant pieces just as much as the fashion and beauty ones.  Frankly I don’t have enough money for the blog to become solely fashion based, nor would I want it to become that.

As a person I am a mixed bag.  I love fashion and Formula One; I love shoes and Sci-Fi movies.  I have (probably too) many opinions that I want to write about and my confidence is up and down like a yo yo.   That is what I wanted my blog to be, a mixed bag which is a reflection of myself.

So I am going to stop worrying about what other people think of my blog and just be me.  Write about what I want to in that second.  I will still probably post as regularly and there will still be the outfit posts, the beauty posts, the wish lists.  The opinion ranty stuff will still be there. 

Now though I am opening myself up to other possibilities.  I might even try a once a month creative writing post.  I’ve wanted to try something like that for a while now but I was (again) worried that it wouldn’t fit my blog.  But it fits me.  So I may well give it a go.

I’ve rambled on a bit here but I think what has been in my head has come across.  Always, that is me, I’m a rambler.  It’s what I do ;)

 

Pushing Boundaries

Today I decided to push myself a little on the old make up front. 

 

I have previously done a post called “Bare Faced Cheek” where I was pushing the boundaries of what amount or lack thereof, makeup I was happy wearing in front of a camera.  Actually going out in public like that is a further step forward.

 

Now I am not going to say to you that I am suddenly going to stop wearing makeup.  I’m not.  I love it and I love how it can transform your face depending on what look you are going for.  But I would also like to feel comfortable going to work with no makeup on.

 

Especially on those mornings when you are running on slow speed and putting on makeup is the thing that will make you miss your bus or make you late for work.  It isn't that important.  Yet I can't count the number of times I have left the house late because I have needed to "make myself presentable".

 

So here I am at work, no makeup, shiny nose, no eyeliner.  The world did not end.  People didn't draw back in horror.  The mirror didn't crack.  I look fine.

 

Whilst makeup is still something I choose to wear on a daily basis, I now know that I can live without it too.  Another step in being comfortable in your own skin.

 

Silent Sunday